Man Naked

When we were at my folks' house, Hannah was mildly shocked that Grandpa was walking around "naked." My dad quickly corrected her.

"I'm not naked. I just don't have a shirt on."

"Grandpa, it's still naked. It's what I call Man Naked."

What is that green thing in my fridge?

No, it's not mold. Or even old jello. (Green jello is ick, by the way. Red jello is the only way to go in my book.)

Instead, it's my son's beanie alligator. No one would fess up to who put it there. Guess the summer heat got to him a bit?

Raisins = wealth?

My 2nd child just asked me, "Mommy, if we had no raisins, and we had no money, what would you call that?"

My oldest piped up, "Poor."

Let's play the Opposite Game!

Okay, to test you, let's start off easy...


What is the opposite of happy? If you said "sad," give yourself a sticker.


Let's try another: the opposite of hot? If you said "cold," consider yourself smart!


Here's the toughie: the opposite of closed eyes? If you are my 2 yr old daughter, you said:


"Close your eyes open!"

Thought for the day - from a 5 yr old

At dinner tonight, Sugar-n-Spice said:

"I wish bad manners were good." All with a wistful expression on her face.

This girl really lives up to her name.

Girls vs Boys

I was tucking Sweetheart in tonight, and as I left the room he said, "Wait! I didn't kiss you!"

He threw his arms around my neck and gave me a sloppy kiss. I smiled into his hair and said, "You are wonderful."

"No, I'm not!"

"You're not?"

"No. I'm not a girl who is wonderful. I am a boy who is cool."

Oh, my mistake. Girls are wonderful; boys are cool. Got it.

Kid funny - Sweetheart

I told Sweetheart to go use the bathroom. While he was sitting there, I told him to try to po*p.

He made some grunting noises, then said, "Nope. My po*p's not crawling out."

Wallet World

Yet again, the van atmosphere leads to deep questions in the back seat.

Sugar-n-Spice: "Sunshine, do animals have wallets?"

Sunshine: "No. Everybody but God and animals have wallets. If they did, it would be a wallet world! Except China. They don't have purses in China."

The only thing we can assume is that since all she really has seen of Chinese pictures are the women in traditional garb, she thinks they don't carry purses.

But oh, how I laugh when I remember this conversation!

Comedy from our house

~ My favorite memory from Christmas this year: Sweetheart was opening a present, which was toys in the store's packaging. Even though he could see the toys in the box, he jumped up and down shrieking, "A BOX! A BOX!" He was so giddy over a box. Too cute.

~ Sunshine said of her daddy when he was goofing around with a lampshade on his head: "Look, Mom! Daddy's lightbulb is burned out!"

~ And when Sunshine was asked why she was picking at her food, didn't she like it, she replied with, "Not excessively."

"When I was your age"

We all heard lots of those sorts of things from our parents and grandparents when we were growing up, right?

Well, in my house, you get to hear it from your older sister, who is a mere 6 years old. LOL

Sleeping... Beefcake?

Last night, our two girls (ages 5 and 4) decided to put on a play for us. This was their first time, and I knew it was likely to be comical, but it was beyond hilarious.

First, they each took a part - one took Sleeping Beauty and the other took Snow White. Snow White had her turn first. She was to sit down and scrub the steps and sing. Well, the scrubbing lasted 2.4 seconds, and then she was off singing and just kept walking until she completely left the room... and never came back. (Snow White is our 4 year old.) This frustrated Sleeping Beauty very much!

Well, then it was Sleeping Beauty's turn, and she enlisted the help of her 2 yr old brother to be the Prince who kisses her - but she insisted it be on the cheek, thank you very much. He walked over to her, looked down at her and said, "No kiss," and walked out. More frustration from Sleeping Beauty.

So Sleeping Beauty asked her daddy (who was in the audience) to be her prince. He walked over, kissed her on the cheek, and then proceeded to fall over limply next to her.

"Daddy, what are you doing? Are you dead?"

And Daddy, keeping his eyes closed says, "No, I caught it from you and now I'm Sleeping Beefcake."

Some "chinese" funnies

For some reason, Sunshine is a bit preoccupied with the Chinese. I am not sure where it came from, but it sure is giving us some laughs!

First, she keeps leaving the final "z" sound off the word. Pronouncing it "Chinee." Giving us lots of giggles.

Yesterday, I was dressing her little brother for church, and she bounces over, "Hey! He looks kinda Chinee in that outfit!" LOL, which he did NOT. I'm really not sure what her line of thinking was there. He was wearing navy pants and a light blue dress shirt...? But - this made her little brother pipe up indignantly, "I not Tinese!" Well, Mommy begs to differ. While he may not be Chinese, he certainly IS Tinese! (If you are having trouble seeing the humor, think "tiny" in association with Tinese. He is a wee boy.)

And a final funny, Sunshine was acting out some scene in her imagination with a bunch of animals, one of which was a moose. Her daddy was sitting close by, and after she had said something apparently in her own little form of Chinese, Daddy said, "I didn't know you knew Chinese!" Her reply was, "Oh no. That wasn't me. That was [insert name of moose, which I can't remember], because he is a moose." Ahhhh. Because, all moose naturally speak Chinese, right? LOL

Did she redeem the earlier comment?

Sugar-n-Spice told me tonight:

Mom, you are a strong lady. You are a beautiful lady.

I'd much rather hear that stuff, lol.

Yet another blow to my self-image

Says Sugar-n-Spice to me tonight:

Mom, your butt is huuuuuge! It's the biggest I've ever seen!

Hmm. Perhaps I can hang my hopes on the fact that she just hasn't seen that many derrieres, at the ripe old age of 3?

A little exercise in counting

As we were sitting at the table today over lunch, Sweetheart began picking up his pieces of food and counting them. Then we played a counting game that went like this:

Sweetheart: One!

Mommy: Two

Sweetheart: Three!

Mommy: Four

Sweetheart: Five!

Mommy: Six

Sweetheart: (paused, looked up at the ceiling in thought...) APPLE!!

Jeopardy question of the day

Question: What is, "Throbbing?"

Answer:

Sunshine told me, "Mommy, my cheek is breathing." After listening to the story of how she and her little sister had collided, we discovered she was feeling a throbbing in her cheek. Don't you love her attempt at describing the feeling?

Overheard the girls talking

We have all sorts of ants around here - different colors, different sizes. The girls think that, in life, anything smaller is a baby and anything bigger is a grownup. So the girls saw a stray tiny ant exploring, and this is what ensued.

Both exclaiming over and over in tiny, adoring voices: "Oh, look at the baby ant! Mommy, did you see the baby ant? It's so cuuuuuute! That baby ant is so tiny! Mommy, did you see the baby ant? Awwwww!"

Sugar-n-Spice, in a very pitying voice: "That baby ant looks lost. Poor. baby. ant. It needs its mommy. I bet it's cold. It needs a pillow and a blanket."

Sunshine, who has suddenly lost her cutesy voice, now speaks in a scornful tone: "Ants do NOT use pillows and blankets. It's an ant."

Sugar-n-Spice's 3 yr old "isms"

Here are some cute mistakes Sugar-n-Spice has made lately when speaking:

"Mommy, I can hear Sunshine's heart beeping!"

"Mommy, can you scrap me in?"

...well, phooey. There was a third one and now I can't remember it.

Something I never DREAMED I'd say...

Mommy to Sunshine:

"You do NOT brush your sister's butt with your brother's toothbrush!!"

ETA: She actually had her sister's bare bottom exposed and was scrubbing the crack. EWWWW. (Glad it wasn't my toothbrush!)

Mommy, can God pick up a...

Some very interesting things get discussed in our van. What makes it even more interesting is the fact that we spend a good part of the like this:

"Mom?"

"What?"

"Mom?"

"Whaaat?"

"MOM!"

"WHAT!"

"Can you turn on the radio?"

"What?"

"Can you TURN on the RADIO?"

"Sure."

"What?"

"SURE!"

"Ok."

"What?"

"OK!"

Today was no different. Our topic was what can God pick up? How strong is He? Sunshine asked all sorts of things like could He pick up cars? houses? mountains? Earth? (Of course, we repeated ourselves many times over the din of the highway.)

The question that made me laugh the most was, "Mom, can God pick up the road? Like a giant sticker?"

Well, now. That is some real visual imagery for ya.